A duck walks into a pharmacy and says “Give me some chap-stick… and put it on my bill, please.”
Conjunctivitis.com – a site for sore eyes.
I needed a password eight characters long so I picked Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
A termite walked into a bar, but he was so short he couldn’t see over it. So he asked one of the regulars, “Is the bartender here?”
What’s ET short for?
He only has little legs.
I used to work in a bookshop on the Information desk. One day a woman came up to me and asked me where the Self-Help section was.
“I’m sorry,” I said, “but if I told you that, it would defeat the purpose.”
It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs, because they always take things literally.
They say a Freudian slip is when you say one thing, but really meant a mother.
You want to be an eBay superstar? Just follow my lead. Over the past year I’ve made twenty-two very profitable sales of my team of homing pigeons.